People love learning more about their personalities and figuring out why they do the things that they do. That’s why the Myers-Briggs® personality assessment has become so popular over the past little while. Similarly, this is also why Gary Chapman’s five love languages has become so popular, as well.
Why not put these two personality frameworks together? If we know someone’s MBTI®, we can figure out their love language, right? It’s just as it sounds: it’s how someone behaves in a relationship and how they want to give and receive love.
If someone has one of these eight MBTIs®, this is what their love language will be.
ISTJs are “Responsible Realists” who are described as “practical” and calm. They’re not big on being in loud places, they don’t love change, and they’re a very loyal partner.
Knowing their MBTI®, their love language would be words of affirmation. While the rule of storytelling is “show, not tell” that’s the opposite of what someone with this love language wants. Instead, they want their partner to tell them how much they love them and make them feel cared for and understood. Words of affirmation could be compliments, assurances that the relationship is going well, and also plenty of ‘I love yous.’
INFPs are “Thoughtful Idealists” who are on the sensitive side. They don’t like being criticized, not knowing what others want them to do, or routines.
When someone is an INFP, their love language is quality time. This isn’t the kind of person who has surface-level interactions. Nope. INFPs are deep and aren’t going to be the type to be casual about relationships. INFPs are quite selective when it comes to sharing their feelings, mainly because it can be hard to say the right words. So if you’re your friends with or dating an INFP, you may never know what they’re really thinking.
Since this MBTI® takes a while to open up to others, once they find the right partner, they will be all about quality time with them.
People with the MBTI® ENTP are “Enterprising Explorers” who are creative but can’t stand details and dull work.
When it comes to their love language, ENTPs love receiving gifts. When their partner comes up with the perfect birthday or anniversary present, they’re over the moon and can truly feel how much their partner loves them. According to the official description, ENTPs are still “independent” even when they’re in a relationship, so this love language makes the most sense for them. ENTPs aren’t going to be about physical touch or words of affirmation or the other love languages. Since they’re creative, it seems like they would enjoy finding great gifts for their loved ones, too.
Unloading the dishwasher, taking out the garbage, and buying paper towels when their partner keeps meaning to — these are all things that couples do for each other that might seem small but mean so much to the other person.
For ISFJs, who are “Practical Helpers,” their love language is acts of service. Many people give and receive love the same way so when they do something nice for their partner, they would really appreciate having the favor returned.
ISFJs are incredibly responsible and loyal to their lovers — especially in times of need.
Besides words of affirmation, receiving gifts, acts of service, and quality time, there is another love language that we haven’t mentioned yet and that is physical touch.
There’s nothing like a hug from our partner when we’re having a bad day or feeling stressed out. While we all love cuddling while watching Netflix or getting said hug, if someone’s MBTI® is ESFP, then their love language is physical touch.
As the 5 Love Languages website explains “nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch.” ESFPs are called “Enthusiastic Improvisers” and they are also described as friendly and expressive.
ESFPs or “Energetic Problem-Solvers” also have the love language of receiving gifts. This is because they’re not necessarily the type to settle down. They want to have a good time and are described as “spontaneous.”
ESTPs typically love the life they lead and throw themselves into any project they’re working on. Because of their impulsive nature, this MBTI® might love receiving lavish gifts or buying these kinds of presents for someone who they are dating. A beach vacation or weekend getaway? That would be a better gift for them.
If we’re dating an ENTJ, we should know that their love language would definitely be acts of service. ENTJs are “Decisive Strategists.” These are people who know how to make things happen. They make plans, follow through, and are productive and efficient.
Because ENTJs are big on being productive, it seems like they would be happy to do things for the person that they love. Cooking dinner, getting takeout, cleaning, taking over the planning of a vacation — these are all acts of service that they would have no problem providing.
ISPFs are “Versatile Supporters” who want their work to matter. They’re not the type to work to live — they definitely live to work. They want to adore their co-workers and they also want to feel appreciated.
When an ISFP is in a serious relationship, their love language is words of affirmation. Since they want their coworkers to say kind words to them, it seems like they would want the same thing in a romantic relationship.
The only thing to note about ISFPs is that it might take them a while to warm up to someone enough to share how they feel.