You’ve probably recreated the scene so many times — you’re hanging out with your girls for yet another Friday night “swipe-right” session, and you’re curled up on the couch studying the many sets of cute guy photos, and you’re expecting to feel defeated, but lo and behold! You’ve swiped by “that guy,” and he looks like he’s got all of the right moves. His photos are cute and you’re nodding along to everything written in his bio, which has thoroughly convinced you to send him a message! Baby, let the games begin, as Taylor Swift once sang.
Now, what’s next? After talking to your guy a bit, you realize your “textationship” may be leading to a “thing.” The anticipation, and perhaps, the slightest case of nerves are completely normal! Wondering how a potential relationship with a new guy will unfold can be pretty intricate; there are more than a few moves and shakes we need to be on the lookout for in order to crack the famous “guy code.”
Of course, a new relationship will come with its fair share of bumps and potential scrapes, but you know yourself; you’re tuned into those certain things a guy says and does which sound your personal alarms. How do we know your new dude is for real, or he may be looking for some time to steal, and unfortunately, he has looked to you in order to time a hypothetical dating stopwatch. If you’ve ever wondered when to stay or run, read on!
A decisive dude receives bonus points! Trying to move away from the “casual talking” stage when you’re communicating with a guy to deciding on a date to scribe in pen on our calendar, can often be an intimidating move. Many times, you almost have to act like a sleuth; you spend so much energy trying to figure out every single detail about your guy’s likes and dislikes, in an attempt to win his heart in an hour’s time!
When a guy knows exactly what he wants to do, trust him! It shows he’s excited enough to hang out with you!
Now, vagueness can be tricky. When you first start talking to a guy, it takes time to get to know one another, and it’s easy to confuse vagueness with shyness.
However, after a certain amount of time, the two of you should be comfortable with each other. When you believe you and your guy have reached the point of comfort and he still seems like he’s keeping some deets to himself, you may want to do some re-thinking!
If your guy is hesitant to tell you where he is, what he wants, or if he can’t make a decision, run!
Your dude obviously knows he’s into you, and he knows exactly what it is about you which makes you special! It’s a positive sign when your guy wants to know the most important details about you, so he can connect the dots to figure out your history and honor everything that’s important to you!
When you new guy expresses interest in meeting your friends, it is a surefire sign he’s into you! He wants to make an impression on the most important ladies in your life, and he’s wanting your girls to know he’s a keeper worthy of your circle.
Having one-on-one dates are vital to getting to know your potential new beau, but it’s a good sign when the two of you are able to incorporate variety into your dates! Whether you’re wanting to introduce your guy to your pals, or if you’re wanting to have a date in a public place and he continuously tries to nudge your hang time to exclusively involve the two of you, or he wants to restrict your dates to private places, there’s a chance he might be the wrong guy!
If you recognize these signs, talk to him! Your opinion matters too!
If you find your brain space is exclusively occupied with thoughts of your guy during the “honeymoon stage,” you’re not alone! It’s also extremely important to remember that you are your own person, with your own thoughts and feelings. If you’re ever feeling like you’re lacking in “me” time where you’re able to devote ample time to self-care because you’re spending too much time with your new guy, it is time to dial down date time!
Express your need to have space. If your guy is respectable and listens to you, you’ll know he cares about your mind and well-being!
Dreaming of a dude who understands the in’s and out’s of romance, and his thoughtfulness results in sweetly romantic gifts seem to be a collective dream in the world of women. Knowing your guy is listening to you, or he isn’t afraid to show he’s in touch with his emotions, is ideal!
In some cases, sweet situations can have the potential to turn sour. If your guy has the tendency to act a little too romantic and your inner voice starts screaming “this is too much,” let your guy know as soon as possible! Feeling comfortable is so, so vital!
There are layers of getting to know your partner through texting! When you’re getting to know someone through a dating app, you have a ton of information at your fingertips, so you know a bit about your guy on the surface, but oftentimes you have a million questions running through your head!
Because it can feel nervewracking while getting to know someone, it’s important to make sure you’re not asking too many questions, so you can allow the conversation to flow. If your dude is good at letting the conversation flow while letting you reveal what you want, he’s golden!
The excitement from dating someone new can be a bit complicated because you want to leave a good and interesting impression! Sometimes, setting the stone to leave a good impression involves a lot of conversation, and one party could have the potential to take the talking stick too far!
If your guy spends all of your time talking about himself without giving you a second to chime in, this could be a warning sign! It could be an inkling of disinterest. If he invests all of his time in his own story, find someone new who appreciates hearing you speak.
One of the major signs your relationship is going to last will be after the two of you experience your first tough situation! As grim as it may sound, sharing the uncomfortable situations can bring you two closer together. Watching how your new beau approaches situations which call for open and honest communication is so important!
It may seem like a no brainer, but the idea of upsetting your new partner can lead you to hold yourself back. When your new guy communicates openly and honestly no matter how difficult it may be, your relationship will be built to last!
It may sound cliche, but your cell phones can act as the third person in your relationship! Your phone can cause issues if one of you is too attached to your phone, or you may just have it in your hand constantly; there’s no limit to your phone’s presence in your relationship!
If your guy never seems to be open about his phone related business, you may want to have this situation on speed dial. If he seems skittish about showing you anything on his phone, he very well may be keeping something to himself, which could be potentially problematic!
One of the most modern day dating situations we have to wonder about is the legitimacy of our potential partner’s dating profile! It can be really easy and super common to embellish the content on our profiles to make the best impression possible. Unfortunately, some couples find out not everything on their profiles proves true in real life; it’s common decency not to lie, of course, but you never know what you’re going to get!
When you get to know your guy and you start to recognize elements of your guy’s profile translate into real life, you can breathe easy!
For better or worse, social media plays a tremendous role in our relationships, and it can be potentially problematic within a relationship! There can be an insane amount of imaginary pressure to post about your life as a couple, and you have to figure out what you share publicly or keep private from the spotlight of social media.
Of course, it’s awesome to decide what a healthy amount of social media sharing is defined as for the two of you. If your guy seems to be hesitant to share you publicly at all, he may not feel serious about you!
Sharing within relationships is key to a successful relationship! Of course, you’ve heard how important it is to share since you were a kid, but sometimes it seems like sharing and learning how to compromise doesn’t come into action until we’re adults. Giving your partner the room to have an equal amount of opportunity to contribute within your relationship is essential to ensuring it can grow!
Trying to find a medium of compromising can take a bit of time, and it’s important to find a partner who is open to compromise. If he knows how to compromise, he’s a keeper!
Let’s be real, when there seems to be more emphasis on one person within a relationship, it may be on the road to nowhere if it isn’t fixed quickly!
If your partner struggles to allow you the room to speak up and contribute to your relationship, then he absolutely isn’t worth being with. Being open and honest with your partner and explaining to him how important it is to make sure your relationship is 50/50, and the both of you are aware of how to compromise to ensure equality in a relationship happens, is so incredibly important for success.
“Honesty” and “History” are two important “H” words in an imaginary “ABCs” list of relationship-related words! Letting your partner know about your general history is essential because it can have a hand in determining the health of your relationship. No matter what the situation may be, it’s so important to be honest about your history, if you choose to share something about yourself with your partner.
If your guy is honest about his life story, especially if it has to do with the success of your relationship, this shows he values you as a person and will value your relationship.
Everyone’s lives are hectic in this day and age of constant contact and technology’s overbearing presence in our lives, so feeling like we hardly have a moment’s peace, is absolutely normal for our generation! In relationships though, building a life together and sharing your lives are commonplace of course, but if your partner tells you he’s having trouble keeping up with the goings on in your life, this is the perfect opportunity to take a step back and assess your relationship!
Take a second to ask your guy what makes him feel like he’s lagging behind. Communicating works wonders!
Have you heard of the saying “a meeting of the minds?” A relationship is similar to that saying in a lot of ways! Your guy obviously likes you and enjoys being with you for your mind, and when the feeling is mutual, the connection within your relationship can be deeper than most!
If your dude goes above and beyond to make you and your relationship feel special, it’s a sign he understands how special your relationship is, and how invested he is to make it thrive. Keeping your relationship fresh and fun will make it last for a long time.
One of the biggest components to the success of a relationship is to remember a relationship exists between two individuals; you are two separate people who are working to build something beautiful together! An important degree to making the relationship succeed is remembering to put yourself first! Do small, but very important things, like making sure you have enough time to do things by and for yourself!
While it’s fun to spend as much time with your new guy as possible, you have to make sure he understands how important “you” time is. If he doesn’t, run the other way!
Having a sense of humor is important for many reasons! Life can feel insanely serious, and navigating those serious waters with a sense of humor can make the journey tolerable. At the surface, of course, having a partner with a sense of humor is a surefire sign your relationship is going to be fun and lively, and navigating the world together will be a blast!
One’s sense of humor speaks volumes about their personality. A sense of humor shows they’re not inclined to take themselves too seriously, and they’re able to laugh about the world around them. You’ll stay laughing!
Technology strikes again! Let’s be honest, we love texting as our primary method of communication, but when we’ve got a partner who has a habit of forgetting to hit “send”, the relationship as a whole has the potential to be left on “read.”
Texting matters at every stage of the relationship. If your guy is consistent enough to establish a decent text thread in the early days of your relationship and he seems to progressively get worse at replying to you, gently confront him about his texting habits in person. This way, he won’t have the option of ignoring you!